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❝ Do you think it's ok to drink while you're pregnant if you're planning on giving the baby up for adoption? ❞

Ok, calm down Christens. We all know it's obviously a little wrong or whatever, but this has become a favorite question of mine to ask complete strangers, especially if I'm at a point where I'm also slurring my words. A close second favorite is: Do you date me? They catch people off guard, it's nice and rewarding. The first one about drinking when pregnant is actually Chelsea Handler's opening line for some of her standup shows, so don't blame me. I love the way people react, pausing and being like "fuck no, are you fucking kidding me?"OR "Of course not." This reaction doesn't make me suddenly see the light and want to shake your hand for showing me the "right" answer. No that makes mama want to backhand you, for not getting that it's a fucking joke.

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SuckitbySina