Wednesday, September 2, 2009

"DID YOU DATE BRITNEY SPEARS?"


Sometimes it's just too good to be true. At the end of summer after a savage night out, we grubbed on pizza at Escape From New York and were heading back home. I had somehow managed to break one of Elise's ankles at the restaurant causing her to become hugely handicapped.

It was 2 am, Paul was carrying Elise on his back as we stomped down Haight Street. With a brimmed hat and a droopy-eyed state of mind, I was in no particular mood, no vacancy. A second later a man comes up to me and gets about 2 inches away from my face. He desperately asked, "Is there anywhere I can get a bite to eat?"

Without missing a beat or any doubt in my mind, I replied, "Did you date Britney Spears?"

Yes. With the landing strip of a goatee, Ed Hardy sweater, and small entourage of about 5, standing in front of me was Adnan Ghalib. Sure he took my poor Britney's innocence and threatened to release her sex tape, I couldn't have been more dumbstruck.

The men around him let out laughs, he mumbled "Oh shit" and quickly walked away. A few seconds later he returned, to pick-up my jaw which had landed on the sidewalk and re-ask me where he could eat something. I directed him to Escape From New York, knowing it had closed 10 minutes prior.

Name-dropping is trashy and frowned upon? Well then, OOPS I DID IT AGAIN. Fuck that, Adnan was my connection to Britney and no one can take that away. So by the simple rules of gravity, this means I met Britney and we're friends.

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