Smoke Break

Preface: I know I should quit. I know, BELIEVE ME...I fucking know. But what? I'm ruining my 60+ years? Ah shit, don't wanna miss out on those. Fuck that, pass me a lighter.

So apparently something called the "economy" is about as bad as Courtney Love's sobriety. I'm not falling for it, must be some kind of urban myth. I'll be honest, I don't know a damn thing about the economy, but I keep hearing everyone complain about it, so that's good enough for me. I've been attributing everything from my back pains to the weather on the damn economy. 

But recently the tax on cigarettes has gone completely buckwild. Its something like 7+ dollars for a pack of Parliament Lights. And when you go through packs faster than a Pamela Anderson wedding (probably faster actually), on a college student budget, IT'S NOT FUN. But cigarettes and alcohol are those two things you can raise the price on cause people will still buy them, they're irreplaceable. Bastards. 

So I've converted to rolling my own cigarettes. I don't care if it's politically incorrect to say, but I feel like a homeless person when I pull out my Bali-Shag pouch of stringy tobacco and papers. It's not as satisfying to say the least, but here are the pitfalls:

-SHIT IS MESSY: I've been pulling loose tobacco out of my pockets and ears for the last three days. The worst is when the pouch opens in your bag and engulfs your belongings with stanky tobacco.

-ITS ANTI-CLIMACTIC: That whole work hard for something and the end result is more satisfying bullshit doesn't fly with me. Every time you want a smoke you have to go through the process. Essentially you have to work hard to smoke, when the reason you may be smoking is that you're stressed about work.

Word on the street is that it looks a little edgier, which obviously is the ONLY reason I smoke anyway, so I guess that's a plus. But Papa Obama I'd really like my bailout to be in the form of cheaper smokes and a 50 foot yacht.